suspiria (dir. luca guadagnino) (2018)

• “I am she” dear god
• Wondering when Susie figured out she was Suspiriorum or if she knew the whole time. If she figured it out, my guess is around the time she learned how to communicate through thoughts? Or maybe, during her dreams when she screamed “I know who I am”?

OKAY YEAH: confirmed by the writer, Susie didn’t know until her time at the studio. She was also twisting the dreams Blanc was sending her (probably why Blanc decided to stop) and she was the presence making the ritual seem off to Blanc.

And my guess was right! When she says she knows who she is, that’s when she’s figured it out. (Huh, extremely obvious in hindsight)

Also, turns out that they tried to use Sara for a host as well :( explains why she’s so fucked up by the end and wishes to die. The article says that she and Patricia have become “half-human” because of the failed transfer

• Very glad with their kind treatment to the old man… they made him very sympathetic so it’s nice to know it wasn’t just to fuck him up and scar us.
• “I can’t believe that includes me… I’m living in Berlin” (paraphrasing): Seems like a normal thing to say when excited about moving, but then we see her childhood obsession with Berlin lol.
• The Susie/Blanc relationship… wow. That part when Blanc tells her that she needs to learn French, and the scene immediately after is Susie speaking and understanding French 😳… and that stare down scene. I didn’t think much of it at the time, but damn. (Also love how it’s foreshadowing Susie’s true self, sitting at the head of the table, because she’s a Mother and on equal, maybe even higher than, level with Blanc.)
• Just realized: that little cheek kids Sara gives Susie during practice for Volk parallels how Susie grants her wishes!!!! What the fuck. Makes me feel better about Susie not kissing her on the mouth during the ritual
• It’s so weird how every girl at the insitution gets nightmares and they treat it as the typical. They all get their memories erased and whatnot, too. How did Patricia get out? It must have been difficult with all the magic
• Honestly at its core (a main character reveals who they really are and the antagonists aren’t the Biggest Bad - the protag is) it’s very similar to The Shards!!! Can’t wait to see what Guadagnino has for it
• While watching I thought it was weird how, when asked to dance, Susie takes off her socks (? idk what they are really) and throws them like she owns the place. And right before that, she takes off a gray sweatshirt to reveal… a maroon/red tank top. God I love how this shows that she subconsciously knows who she is (no other dancer is shown doing it, so) and that she’s concealing something within. AUGH

Sara: You're making some kind of deal with them.
Susie: I don't know what you're talking about.
Sara: The Matrons.
Susie: Whatever you have in your head, Sara, nothing is wrong.
Sara: How can you know what they'll ask of you in return?
Susie: Nothing's wrong.
Sara: You just haven't seen the bill yet.

• THIS EXCHANGE I LOVE HOW Sara is so concerned to the point of crying and even though Susie knows about it all and could tell her, she doesn’t…. Her consolations seem a bit fake but it’s still RIGHT in a way, because she knows who she is and knows she’s not the one in danger. It’s also a good example of the magical dialogue within the movie. It always manages to surprise because of its unorthodoxness… “You just haven’t seen the bill yet”

letterboxd can be helpful sometimes

text if it's hard to read

"Ah, Lacan!"

out of all the gruesome, unforgettable images whirling around in my head after seeing Suspiria on halloween, i keep coming back to this offhand comment made by dr. klemperer. it's a bit difficult to tell if his, "Ah, Lacan!" is sneering or impressed, if the doctor rejects or regards the controversial french psychologist's work. either way, there is definite validity in applying it to the film, especially since directer luca guadagnino comes from an academic background.

so let's talk film theory, ladies and germs! i have a cinema studies degree and i swear to god i'm gonna use it for something!

Lacan's theory of the "mirror stage" refers to the moment that infants begin to recognize themselves in the mirror, usually between the ages of six to eighteen months. they begin to have a sense of their own identity in relation to others around them, creating their own "imago." in other words, it is this moment when our consciousness identifies that there is a difference between the Real (our physical self) and the Specular (our ideal self). lacan theorizes that we then spend the rest of our lives desiring to become a unified self again, as we were before the mirror stage.

if lacan suggests that the ideal self is reflected in the mirror, then the ideal body is the one laying on the floor of that mirrored room. grotesquely contorted, bones sharply imprinting against bruised skin, soul unequivocally given to the dance. many would perceive this heap of rotting, soiled flesh as revolting, the antithesis to the ideal. to mother suspiriorum, it's a captivating coalescence of carrion. it's beautiful.

yes, yes, it's beautiful.

keep dancing.

also this youtube comment under thom playing Unmade:

Death's words "Come under my wings little bird". Terrifyingly Beautiful.

When this song played, I immediately thought of the Wasteland epigraph by Eliot: "For with my own eyes I saw the Sibyl hanging in a bottle, and when the young boys asked her, 'Sibyl, what do you want?', she replied, 'I want to die'." She had asked for eternal life, but neglected to ask for eternal youth.

the full quote is:

‘Nam Sibyllam quidem Cumis ego ipse oculis meis vidi in ampulla pendere, et cum illi pueri dicerent: Σίβυλλα τί θέλεις; respondebat illa: άποθανεîν θέλω.’

eliot showing off both greek and latin - great flex man. 🙄

which can have a translation of:

I saw with my own eyes the Sibyl at Cumae hanging in a cage, and when the boys said to her: “Sibyl, what do you want?” she answered: “I want to die.”